Chibi Bakura's First December
by Mystical Knight Dragon
Summary: Maybe this should be rated PG... Have you ever noticed that the title explains everything best?
1. Snow Storm and the Bill Molester

Chibi Bakura's First December  
  
Mystical Knight Dragon: Merry Christmas everyone! This is a story that I thought up during an ice storm that we had. We got let out of school early, and while I was waiting for my bus to be called, I began to write this out of sheer boredom. Any /./ means that it's italicized. Most of that means that it's someone thinking. But sometimes it's not. Anyways, in this, I shafted a lot of people in my classes, so if you don't know what I'm talking about, um.ignore it? Maybe not? I dunno. Yami Bakura is Bakura, Hikari Bakura is Ryou, Yami Malik is Marik, Hikari Malik is Malik, and Yami Yugi is Yami.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! or anyone in my class, except for me; but I'm not really mentioned in this. I don't own Zelda either. I do own Harp. He's my character. I made up purple moose, too. Or, at least I think I did...  
  
Warnings: Rated PG-13 for adult content. Maybe it should be PG... There is no language since they are chibis, but there are quite a few homos. I stuck something else in there too that I don't remember all that well what it was. I don't exactly remember what I was going to say, either. Which brings me to my next point: this is Yaoi. Don't like, don't read, and please don't flame or I'll shove it up your- -  
  
  
  
/December 1: Snow Storms and Bill the Chibi Molester/  
  
It was a cold winter morning when Chibi Bakura woke up. It was the first of December: his first December away from Egypt. He was really excited, but it was just so cold!  
  
He jumped out of bed, put on his clothes, and rushed to phone to call his best friend, Chibi Malik.  
  
"Hello!" he screeched when his friend picked up.  
  
"Hello!" Chibi Malik shouted back. "Happy December!"  
  
"You too!" Chibi Bakura was really excited as he ran to the door to rush off to Chibi Malik's while he was still on the phone, but when he opened his door, he got a big shock. "Uh...Malik? Is there a whole bunch of white stuff outside your house too?"  
  
Chibi Malik got off his bed and hobbled over to his window. When he looked, he screamed in fear. Every inch of space was coated in some sort of white substance. "Bakura? What is that stuff out there?"  
  
"I don't know..." stammered Chibi Bakura.  
  
At that point Chibi Ryou walked down the stairs to find Chibi Bakura standing with the door wide open, staring outside. "Either go out or stay in," he reprimanded.  
  
"Ryou!" Chibi Bakura screamed at his hikari. "What is that stuff?!"  
  
Chibi Ryou walked over to the door and looked out. "Snow!" he shouted. "Yeah!" Then he ran back up the stairs to get some warmer clothing.  
  
Chibi Bakura stared after him for a while then said to his friend, "I think Ryou's gone crazy. I'm going to go save him. I'll call you back later, okay?"  
  
"Okay," said Chibi Malik reluctantly. "Be careful. Talk to you later."  
  
With that, they hung up. Chibi Malik just sat on his couch and stared out the window, watching more of the white stuff fall. Chibi Bakura, on the other hand, dashed after his hikari to check on his sanity.  
  
When Chibi Bakura reached Chibi Ryou's room, he found his hikari bundled tightly in winter clothes. "Ryou!" shouted Chibi Bakura. "What is eating you?!"  
  
Chibi Ryou looked a bit confused, but then realized that he must look pretty silly all bundled up like that. "It's okay, Bakura," he told his yami. "It's cold, so I put on lots of clothes. You probably should put warmer clothes on, too."  
  
Chibi Bakura nodded, then looked over to his hikari's bed and saw his scarf. "Ryou!" he shouted. "What is that?!"  
  
Chibi Ryou followed his gazed, then smiled wickedly. "I don't know Bawkuwa!" Then he managed to kick the bed without his yami noticing. "Oh my gosh! It just moved!"  
  
"It's gonna kill us!" With that comment, Chibi Ryou started laughing so hard that he fell over.  
  
"What are you laughing at?" Chibi Bakura asked, going red with rage.  
  
After a little bit Chibi Ryou was finally able to gasp out "scarf!" between giggles.  
  
"Scarf," Chibi Bakura sounded out. Chibi Ryou just sat there and laughed. Chibi Bakura loved watching his hikari laugh. The darker half decided to mess around with the "scarf" to make him laugh even more.  
  
He walked over to the bed and poked it a bit to make sure that it wasn't dangerous. Then he picked it up and wrapped it around his neck and was pretending to strangle himself when his hikari spoke up:  
  
"Bakura? That's how you're supposed to put on a scarf..."  
  
Chibi Bakura looked embarrassed, and he left the room to call Chibi Malik to tell him that his hikari was alright. Just as he was leaving the room, something soft whacked him in the back of the head. He screamed and ran out of the room yelling, "The scarves are after me! Help!" All the while Chibi Ryou just sat there laughing hysterically.  
  
When Chibi Bakura reached his room, he wasn't in the mood for calling his friend. He was beginning to get strange feelings when he was around his hikari, like his heart was expanding. He remembered feeling this same way about the kawaii little puppy he had found once. But then again, he and Malik had set fire to it...  
  
A little bit later Chibi Ryou made his way to his darker half's room with some winter clothes for him. The lighter half laughed the whole time that his yami struggled with the winter clothing. After a while Chibi Bakura began to get annoyed. "Please help me!" he said exasperatedly. Chibi Ryou gave a quick explanation about how to put on layers of clothes and then started toward the door to leave. "Ryou!" Chibi Bakura moaned at him. "I said please!"  
  
Chibi Ryou grinned. He loved his yami, but he knew that he didn't feel the same way back. His yami probably didn't even know what love was, much less be capable of loving someone or something. "Okay, Bakura. I'll help you."  
  
About thirty minutes later, Chibi Bakura was in so much winter clothing that he could hardly walk. Chibi Ryou, on the other hand, was used to it and ran down the hall towards the stairs. Chibi Bakura waddled after his hikari as fast as he could, which was not very fast.  
  
"After you," the lighter half grinned, indicating the stairs.  
  
Something about this grin freaked Chibi Bakura out, but he started down the steps anyways. He was having enough trouble as it was, but when he got to the second step from the top, he felt a light push on his back. He tottered a bit, trying to regain his balance, but in the end gravity won and he fell face-forward all the way down the steps. All the while Chibi Ryou just stood there and laughed. In the end, though, he laughed so hard that he fell down the steps, too, and landed right on top of his yami.  
  
As luck would have it, at that exact moment the doorbell rang. Chibi Ryou jumped up as best he could and ran to answer it.  
  
"Hello!" shouted Chibi Yugi. Chibi Yami was still far back down the street, trying to avoid any bits of snow that he came across. Chibi Ryou giggled a bit when he saw Chibi Yami. He probably had more clothes on than Chibi Bakura did, who was /still/ trying to get up.  
  
"Hurry up Bawkuwa!" Chibi Ryou shouted at his yami.  
  
When Chibi Bakura was still struggling five minutes later, Chibi Ryou sighed and went to help him up. Once this task was completed, Chibi Ryou ran out the door to Chibi Yugi and Chibi Yami. Chibi Bakura just stood at the door and looked out.  
  
"Come on Bawkuwa!" shouted Chibi Yugi.  
  
"It's my first snow, too," Chibi Yami tried to comfort him. When Chibi Bakura still wouldn't move, he tried again. "You aren't afraid are you?"  
  
Chibi Bakura resented this. He was going to kill Chibi Yami for that! Stupid Chibi Pharaoh! Chibi Bakura took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and plunged into the snow. He was silent for a moment then managed to moan out, "COLD!!!" In synchronization, Chibis Yami, Yugi, and Ryou looked at each other and burst out laughing. "What's so funny?" Chibi Bakura challenged.  
  
Chibi Yugi was about to tell him, but Chibi Ryou caught the murderous glint in his yami's eyes and cut him off. "It's nothing." Then he changed the subject by saying, "We'wre going to go over to Joey and Tristan's to see if they want to have a snowball fight. You want to come?"  
  
"No thanks," Chibi Bakura answered. He /hated/ Chibi Joey and Chibi Tristan. "I think I'm going to go see what Malik is up to." With that they took their separate ways, but not before Chibi Bakura had pushed Chibi Yami into the snow.  
  
A few minutes after the chibis had departed, Chibi Bakura had lost his way in all the snow. In some places, the snow was over his head! When he realized that he was lost, he began to panic. He had never gotten lost alone before. Chibi Ryou or Chibi Malik had always been there.  
  
After he had passed the same hobo ten times, he was really afraid. In the end, he just sat down on the sidewalk and bawled. The tears on his cheeks made him shiver and cry even harder. Soon he could hardly feel his body. When this happened, chance decided to bring some "help" by.  
  
"What's the matter little boy?" asked a man walking by that was (how to put this nicely...) bi.  
  
Chibi Bakura looked up. The, um, man (cough, cough) seemed friendly enough, so he answered: "My hikari told me to never talk to strangers."  
  
The man smiled and said, "My name is Bill." Then he shook Chibi Bakura's hand. "There now. We aren't strangers anymore, are we?"  
  
"I guess not..."  
  
He was on the verge of telling Bill that he was lost and didn't know where the Ishtar's house was when another man walked by and whispered, "Don't trust him! Bill will hurt your hikari in unusual ways!"  
  
Chibi Bakura's eyes went wide. He had heard of these types of people before. He jumped up, kicked Bill in the place where he shouldn't, and ran off down the street. While he was looking back over his shoulder to see if Bill was still following him, he plowed into someone.  
  
"Watch where you're going!" a familiar voice shouted at him.  
  
Chibi Bakura looked to see whom he had run into. When he saw, he shouted "Malik!" and helped up his friend.  
  
"Where were you going in such a hurry?" asked Chibi Malik.  
  
"I'm running away from the Bill molester."  
  
Chibi Malik's eyes widened. "You actually met him?"  
  
"Yeah... He was scary."  
  
At that point they both began to shiver and couldn't feel their bodies. "Why don't we go back to my house?" asked Chibi Malik. "Isis might make us some hot chocolate."  
  
When they reached the gate to the Ishtar's house, something cold and hard whacked the two chibis in the face. "COLD!!!" they both shouted in unison.  
  
Chibi Isis waddled out of the house as fast as she could when she heard their cries. What she saw was her little brother and his friend crying from the cold, and a giant wall of ice hiding her little brother's insane yami. "Marik!" she shouted at him. "What do you think you're doing?!" Chibi Marik just stood there and grinned. Then he ran off, probably to do some other evil and idiotic deed.  
  
Chibi Bakura stared at Chibi Isis. "Gosh she's beautiful," he thought. Then he remembered his hikari. "But not as beautiful as Ryou. Wait a minute. What am I thinking about?! That's just wrong!"  
  
Fifteen minutes after the chibis had finished their hot chocolate in front of a fire, the doorbell rang. Chibi Isis went to answer it, and called back to her little brother that Chibi Ryou was at the door. Chibi Malik and Chibi Bakura jumped up, grabbed their jackets, and hobbled over to see the door standing wide open with no one there.  
  
"Ryou?" Chibi Malik called out into the snow. The two chibis were very puzzled, so they wandered outside to look for the missing chibi.  
  
When they were no more than ten feet from the safety of the house, about a million snowballs bombarded them from all sides. Chibi Bakura's first instinct was to cry, but he didn't. He needed to be brave for his hikari.  
  
Chibi Malik, on the other hand, was furious. He called his yami through his mind link for extra backup, and then unsheathed the knife from his millennium rod. "There will be blood spilt today," he said to himself, licking his lips.  
  
Chibi Bakura sensed his thought. He knew that he should stop his friend, but he loved death: the sight, the smell, the shrieks they made, but most of all he loved killing the victim. The little chibi looked down at the millennium ring he had around his neck. He had never really thought about it before. All he knew was that he could read peoples' minds with it. Although now was just a good of time as any to test its limits.  
  
He reached in his pockets to see if there was an instruction manual of some sort, but all he found was his deck of cards. He loved his cards. They were his whole life. /So is my ring./ He flipped through his deck and came to his favorite card: the Man Eater Bug. He pulled it out and held it up.  
  
His ring, card, and body began to glow. He closed his eyes against the blinding light, and when he was finally able to open them again, a giant Man Eater Bug was standing right before him! He tried to scream out in fear, but found that his voice was gone.  
  
"Call it back! Call it back!" He heard the voice from far off. His arm was getting heavy, so he began to lower it. As it went down, the Bug began to flicker. Its cold eyes stared at him, as if daring it to finish him off, and Chibi Bakura dropped off into a faint from cold and fear.  
  
A bit later Chibi Bakura regained consciousness. He looked around and saw that he was still in the Ishtar's yard. His body was numb with cold, and many other bodies had surrounded him. He tried to speak, but nothing came.  
  
Then a voice that was unfamiliar to all of them could be heard. "Move out of the way, please," it said. A man with brown eyes filled with worry, gold earrings, and a turban came into Chibi Bakura's view. After checking the chibi's health, the man's eyes became filled with rage. He was about to speak again when someone else spoke up.  
  
"What's the matter with him?" it asked. Chibi Bakura knew that voice. He had a bit of trouble placing it, but then it hit him: Bill the Chibi Molester! The chibi's eyes went wide with fear. He tried to warn the others, but his voice still wouldn't work. It seemed frozen within him. Then Bill spoke up again: "I am the boy's father."  
  
"Alright then," said the man in the turban. "You may do what you want with him." Chibi Bakura freaked out. Where are your hikaris when you need them?!  
  
Then Chibi Malik's voice was heard: "Why can't he just stay with me? He was supposed to spend the night anyways." Chibi Bakura sighed with relief, or at least tried to. His lungs felt frozen and it hurt to breathe.  
  
"I don't think that's such a good idea right now," said Bill. "He seems to be in some sort of hypothermia."  
  
Chibi Bakura felt himself being lifted. "Please don't let me go with the Bill molester!" he thought hard. "Please, no! Oh, where is Ryou?! He's going to be in so much trouble if he doesn't come to help me!"  
  
Chibi Ryou, this whole time, had been standing behind a tree making snowballs for a snowball fight later on. Suddenly he heard a small whisper of "Please no!" echoing around his head that sounded strangely like his yami's voice. He peeked around the tree and saw a man with gold earrings and a turban, a man who was a man, yet not, and a whole bunch of chibis standing in a circle around something. The little chibi walked over to the others and tried to peek around them. When he did not succeed, he asked, "What's up guys?"  
  
Chibi Malik spoke up. "Bawkuwa has hypiefermanal, so his daddy's going to take him home."  
  
Chibi Ryou looked around. "I don't see my daddy," he said. "Where is he? I thought he died..."  
  
The chibis and the man in the turban simultaneously looked from Chibi Bakura to Chibi Ryou to Bill. "What did you say?" asked the man in the turban, his eyes going cold with anger and hatred against Bill.  
  
Chibi Ryou took one look into those eyes and quailed with fear. "I-I- I'm no-not s-s-s-uppos-s-sed t-to t-t-talk t-to s-s-trangers-s-s," he stammered out. Chibi Bakura mentally slapped himself. Oh, if only he could move right then, his hikari would be dead!  
  
The man in the turban looked confused for a second, then nodded. "I am Shadi," he introduced. "Now, what do you mean that this man is not your father?" The minutes passed, and all you could hear was the sound of their breathing. Chibi Isis had gone in and gotten some blankets for Chibi Bakura, and now he was beginning to warm up. When Chibi Ryou still hadn't said anything for ten minutes, Chibi Bakura took a deep breath and managed to gasp out "Bill molester!"  
  
Everyone stared down at the little chibi. He was panting very hard and his face had almost no color at all. The man called Shadi took off his jacket, revealing robes of Egyptian cotton, and wrapped it around Chibi Bakura, trying to bring some life back into him. The little chibi was very embarrassed. He was always independent, but something about the giant Man-eater Bug seemed to have taken some of his life and will to go on away. Shadi looked up at Bill, his eyes cold and dark with hatred. Bill smiled a bit, opened his mouth to say something, but them looked deep into Shadi's eyes and ran away.  
  
"Okay, Bawkuwa," said Chibi Isis. "Come inside to warm up."  
  
As she started to lead the chibi inside, Shadi spoke up: "I think I'm going to need to take care of him for a little while." Chibi Bakura's eyes widened and he began to shake from fear. "Just for a little while," Shadi assured him, his eyes softening a great deal. He picked up the chibi, and, despite his fear, Chibi Bakura felt relaxed. But when he started to move away from the others, the calamity was replaced by a deep sense of fear.  
  
"Ryou," he moaned at his hikari. Chibi Ryou just stood there in shock, staring after his darker half being carried away by a man who he didn't even know. Then the man began to speak words of comfort. Chibi Bakura tuned them out. He did not want to be comforted; he just wanted to be with his hikari.  
  
Halfway to their destination (wherever that was...) Chibi Bakura felt himself sinking: the cold, hard cement of the sidewalk getting closer and closer to his face. Shadi landed in a faint on the ground, avoiding the chibi as best he could. Chibi Bakura looked up from the spot that he had rolled off to and saw two men in spandex acrobat suits grinning down at him, and one of them was holding a very large rock.  
  
"He will make a very good prop," said one of the men in a very feminine voice. Chibi Bakura just sat there and shook, making the men laugh. They picked him up and brought him to their van that said GAY BROS CIRCUS on the side in red and gold paint. They carefully placed the chibi in the back seat. When they turned around, the little chibi was able to see that they had their names on the backs of their shirts. One shirt said Chance, and the older man's shirt said Mark. Chance and Mark closed up the van, got in the front seat, and drove off.  
  
Chibi Bakura found that his thoughts were drifting back to his hikari. "Ryou!" he moaned silently. Then his thoughts drifted back to Shadi. /Who is he, anyways? Why had he wanted to take me away? Is he alright? And what did Bill have to do with anything? Will I ever get to spend the night at the Ishtar's? Will I ever get to see my hikari again?/ He began to stare out the window after a while. Thousands of trees and cows began to flick by. "Ryou!" he moaned again and continued staring.  
  
  
  
Chibi Ryou stared after his yami being taken away by Shadi. Now he would probably never see him again. He sat down and began to cry. "It's alright," comforted Chibi Isis, and she took him inside and made him some tea.  
  
About twenty minutes later, Chibi Ryou got a short image of cows and trees. Then he heard his name being whispered all around him. He looked up and tried to place the voice. It sounded like his yami's! "Bakura!" he shouted and ran to the door. When he flung it open, he was surprised not to see his yami, but yet another man (_). But this one was selling Girl Scout cookies.  
  
"Would you like to buy some cookies?" he asked, sounding like a little girl.  
  
Chibi Ryou's face went blank for a second, and then he regained his composure and said, "Yeah...sure... Why not?" He turned around to call to Chibi Isis, but that's when the man grabbed him. The chibi felt himself being pulled backwards and out into the snow, wtihout a jacket. "COLD!" he moaned as he fell into some ice.  
  
"Oh, please be quiet," said the man. "I'm here to help you!" Chibi Ryou seriously doubted this, but let himself be shoved into the man's car, trying to be brave like his yami would have been in this situation. But some things are just too much on the mind, and he broke down in tears.  
  
Hours later, they stopped in the middle of a field. "And why are we in the middle of a field?" asked Chibi Ryou.  
  
"Because the authoress ran out of ideas and needs to stall a bit to think of something," answered the man. "Oh, and by the way, the authoress doesn't want to call me "man" anymore, so she's forced me to tell you my name: Mr. Homo."  
  
Chibi Ryou's eyes went wide. "Mister...Homo?" he asked. "Wait.. I thought you got arrested last month..."  
  
Mr. Homo looked uncomfortable. "I was..." he said slowly. "But that's all in the past. Right now we need to get out of this field!"  
  
"But de authoress still doesn't know where to send us!"  
  
"Aw, she won't kill us... At least I don't think she will..."  
  
"You obviously haven't read any of her fanfics..."  
  
"She even thought about killing me!" said Harp, popping up from no where.  
  
Mr. Homo looked confused. "And you are...?"  
  
"Not supposed to be here." With that, Harp disappeared in a puff of purple smoke.  
  
"That was...odd," said Mr. Homo as he drove out of the field at ninety miles an hour.  
  
Chibi Ryou looked amused. "It's the attack of the random characters!" he shrieked. Link and Navi were about to pop up when Mr. Homo drove past a circus. "The circus! The circus!" Chibi Ryou shouted over and over. He looked up at Mr. Homo and gave him the puppy dog eyes. "Can we please go to the circus, please?"  
  
Mr. Homo gave in. "Alright..." he said. "But just for a little bit. I'm not being a very good hostage keeper person."  
  
"Yeah!" shouted Chibi Ryou jumping all around. He had been in a much better spirit ever since Harp came by and gave him a big bar of chocolate. Mr. Homo groaned. He just knew that he was going to regret this. Chibi Ryou looked up and saw a big sign on the side of a truck. "What does dat sign say, Mister Homo?"  
  
Mr. Homo looked and saw the sign. "It, uh, says GAY BROS CIRCUS," he said hesitantly. He really didn't want to be teaching a little kid about homos right now...  
  
"Yeah!" shrieked the little chibi on sugar high. "Gay bros! Gay bros!"  
  
Mr. Homo's mind was about to collapse. Of all the hostages that he had taken, this one had to be the worst! He just wouldn't shut up! He looked around and saw another little chibi that appeared to be knocked out and being held up by two men in spandex suits. When he drove closer to inspect the men, he saw something that shocked him. "That little chibi looks exactly like you!" Chibi Ryou looked up, but the thing that Mr. Homo had been pointing to was gone.  
  
"Can we go see de elephants now?" asked Chibi Ryou looking up at the enormous creatures that futilely struggled against the iron bars of their cages. Mr. Homo shuddered. First the kid wouldn't shut up or calm down from his sugar-high, and now he wanted to see the hideous gray beasts that did absolutely nothing except make a whole bunch of noise. Mr. Homo was about to tell him that they would absolutely not go to see the elephants, and they were going to turn around that instant when Chibi Ryou whipped out the puppy-dog eyes. Mr. Homo gulped and drove around to find a place to park.  
  
"Elephants!" shrieked Chibi Ryou. "I get to see the elephants! And the tigers! And the penguins!"  
  
"Hey!" shouted Mr. Homo. "You just asked about the elephants!"  
  
"But you pass everything to get to the elephants." Mr. Homo groaned. This was going to be a long day.  
  
When they got out of the car, the little chibi immediately shot for the animal cages behind the main tent. Mr. Homo followed at a slow trudge, regretting every step that he took. Then he thought of something: Why not just leave him here? No one would ever know! Mr. Homo looked around for the chibi, saw that he was three cages ahead, and then dashed behind the monkeys and into the tent beyond, only to come face-to-face with Mark and Chance.  
  
Chibi Ryou was not aware of any of this, so he continued walking until he got to the elephants. "Elephants! Elephants!" he shouted at the big, gray beasts.  
  
His cries were heard by one of the circus staff. It was another chibi molester by the name of Adam, who just happened to be Bill's boyfriend. "Isn't Slutty the Elephant beautiful?" Adam asked, coming up from behind him. Chibi Ryou was about to answer when Adam grabbed him and dragged him off to the tent that Mr. Homo had gone into. "Here he is, boss," said Adam to Mark. "He was at the elephants looking at Slutty."  
  
Chibi Ryou looked around. He had never been in a circus tent before, much less any tent. He saw a man in leopard patterned spandex (_ ew!) hanging from the ceiling who looked oddly like Mr. Homo. There were thousands of glass figurines everywhere and some oddly shaped whips.  
  
"That's wonderful, Adam!" grinned Mark. "He's gotten out at least ten times today! We're going to need to put a bell on him or something." Chibi Ryou was confused, but he allowed himself to be led away by the circus tamers.  
  
Mark and Chance led the chibi past all the animals, the tents that he workers lived in, and all the rednecks' trailers that were parked in random places. At last they reached another tent that was very much like the first and went inside. There were two hallways leading off the main portion, and they went down the one to the right. There were many twists and turns and more tunnels than the chibi could count.  
  
Finally they reached a little door that blended in with the rest of the tent. They wandered into the next room and saw another little chibi attached to a wall with chains on his arms and legs- -and he looked exactly like Chibi Ryou!  
  
"Bakura!" Chibi Ryou shrieked at his yami.  
  
"Ryou!" Chibi Bakura shouted back at his hikari.  
  
Chance and mark just stood there and looked confused.  
  
Chibi Bakura managed to free an arm from the ropes binding him. He reached into his pocket to make sure his deck was still there, and pulled out the top card: The Man-Eater Bug. He held it up and was surrounded by a soft glow of light. This time he knew the effects that he would receive and was ready for them. He was still shocked, though, when a giant Man-Eater Bug emerged from the card that he was holding. The Bug reared up and immediately killed Mark and Chance. The chibi lowered the card, stuffed it back in his pocket, and proceeded to get himself from the contraptions that bound him to the wall.  
  
Chibi Ryou was enthralled (A/N: Ooo... Big word...). He had heard about his yami killing people 5000 years ago for fun, and he had seen him kill a few animals; but /never/ had he seen him kill a /human/ without any trace of worry! The darker half just looked so calm as he tried to undo his feet from the wall. Chibi Bakura met his hikari's eyes with a cold, hard stare, and the light let his gaze drop.  
  
The minutes ticked by slowly, but finally Chibi Bakura had released himself from the wall. They exited the room, and, with extreme difficulty, made their way back to the main portion of the tent. After another brief stop to see Slutty the Elephant, the two chibis made their way to the main road. A pair of lavender eyes watched them leave.  
  
When they got to the road, Chibi Ryou ventured to ask, "How are we going to get home?" Chibi Bakura grinned evilly, stuck out his fist, and made a thumbs-up motion. "You're going to hitch-hike?!" he gasped.  
  
"Yes," said the darker half, "and so are you."  
  
Presently a black car drove by. "Where are you headed?" asked a voice from inside.  
  
Before Chibi Ryou could stop him, Chibi Bakura blurted, "To the Ishtar's house." Chibi Ryou mentally slapped himself. He was going to /kill/ his yami for that.  
  
"I'm headed that way," said the voice. He unlocked the doors and added a cheerful, "Hop in!" The two chibis climbed into the back seat, took a look at the driver, and gasped.  
  
  
  
Chibi Isis was in her room when she heard the doorbell ring. "My lazy brother better get that," she thought to herself. Moments later she heard the door slam, and a pitiful moan of "COLD!!!" Her eyes widened, and she bounded down the steps to the front door just in time to see a car drive off from her driveway. Her first instinct was to check for her brother, but why would anyone want to take /him/? (A/N: Me! Me!) So she looked around for Chibi Ryou. After twenty minutes of searching, she still couldn't find him, and was panicking beyond control. At that moment, her younger brother decided to pop up.  
  
"Is something the matter, Isis?" he asked.  
  
"Yes something is the matter!" she yelped. Chibi Malik was about to slink away from the rabid Chibi Isis, but she grabbed him and threw him on the ground. "Where is Ryou?!"  
  
Chibi Malik's body went limp. He had now lost both of his best friends in the same day. "What do you mean where is he?" he asked, thinking maybe he hadn't heard correctly.  
  
"I mean what I said!" She grabbed her brother by the arm and jerked it as hard as she could. "Now where is he?!" Chibi Malik's face went white. He had no idea where Chibi Ryou went, but why not mess with her mind a bit? He smiled a bit as he stood up, and pulled the dagger out of his millennium rod. It still had a little blood from that poor animal that got too close to him, though Chibi Isis took this the wrong way and her eyes went wide. "Y-you k-killed him?" she stammered. Chibi Malik just stood there and grinned.  
  
Chibi Marik watched the whole scenario. He was proud of his hikari for actually sticking up for himself, but he really needed to learn when to tick off his sister and when not to. Right now was the time not to, and since his hikari wasn't doing anything about finding his friends, it was up to him. He ran out the door, stole the neighbor's keys that they had so foolishly left in the ignition, and sped off. He drove /terribly/! Not only was he too short to drive, but he had never driven anything in all the 5000 plus years that he had been alive. Those poor sheep that will never breathe again after being squashed by a crazy yami...  
  
After a little bit, he passed a big sign that said GAY BROS CIRCUS next exit. Not being able to read anything but hieroglyphics, this didn't do him any good, but somehow he knew to turn down the road anyways.  
  
He stopped the car behind a tree, or rather crashed the car /into/ the tree, and made his way towards the circus parking lot. He saw a very nice van with the keys in the ignition (How many idiotic people are there?) and hopped in. He revved up the engine and was about to drive off when he saw two figures out the rear-view mirror trudging through the snow towards the main road. Chibi Marik sped from the parking lot and towards the two hitch-hikes. He screeched to a halt just in front of them and asked where they were headed.  
  
"To the Ishtar's house," said Chibi Bakura.  
  
"I'm headed that way," Chibi Marik told them as he unlocked the doors. "Hop in!" The two chibis climbed in the back seat and gasped.  
  
"Marik!" they screamed. The crazy psycho yami locked the doors and sped off down the road.  
  
"Marik..." started Chibi Bakura. "You're going the wrong way..." Chibi Marik sweat dropped and wheeled the car around, but halfway it slipped on a chunk of ice and spun out of control. The chibis gritted their teeth as they crashed into a tree.  
  
"Thanks Marik!" Chibi Ryou yelled at him. "Now how are we going to get back?!"  
  
Chibi Bakura hopped out of the car. "I don't know about you two, but I'm gonna hitch-hike a freak that can /actually drive/!"  
  
Chibi Marik got very offensive at this comment. "What is that supposed to mean?!" he yelled at his friend. Chibi Bakura just stood there and glared. This made Chibi Marik very uneasy, so he tackled Chibi Bakura.  
  
"Stop it guys!" Chibi Ryou shouted at them. "You're ruining the Christmas spirit!" The two other chibis glanced up from their fight.  
  
"Chwissmist?" said Chibi Marik. "What is that?"  
  
Chibi Ryou sighed. He really didn't feel like going into detail at that moment, so he changed the subject. "Let's go home please. It's freezing!" Chibi Bakura walked over to the road and attempted to hitch- hike a motorcycle when he was stopped by his hikari. "No way we're doing that again! That's the reason that we /don't/ have a car right now." Chibi Ryou glared at Chibi Marik, but only got a mirrored effect.  
  
They had not walked more than 500 feet when a car pulled up next to tem. "Need a ride?" asked a voice from inside the car.  
  
"Please!" moaned the yamis before Chibi Ryou could stop them, for they were so cold they were numb. The three chibis stumbled into the car and saw that the driver was none other than Bill!  
  
"Thanks a lot, Bakura," Chibi Ryou said accusingly. Chibi Bakura looked very upset at this comment, for all he had been trying to do was save his precious hikari from the cold. "Now, you got us into this mess, you and Marik, so you have to get us out of it."  
  
Chibi Bakura and Chibi Marik simultaneously looked at each other and yelled, "Attack of the random characters!" Immediately Link and Navi popped in on a pink cloud. Link landed on Bill, and Navi.didn't...exactly land...  
  
"Help us, O Mighty Chicken That Floats," commanded Chibi Marik. Navi sweat dropped and jerked them out of the car. Link tried to escape, but Bill had him in such a tight huggle that he couldn't even budge. When Navi and the chibis had gotten pretty far away from Bill's car, Chibi Marik burst out, "Thank you so much, O Mighty Chicken That Floats!"  
  
Navi got very angry at this. It turned red and yelled very loudly, "I AM NOT A CHICKEN!!!"  
  
There was a moment's pause, then Chibi Marik contradicted, "Yes you are. You just think you're not." Navi just flew away, too angry and embarrassed to say anything. "Bye Almighty Chicken That Floats!" Chibi Marik called after it as the chibis continued walking.  
  
"You really shouldn't tick off spirits," said Chibi Bakura. "They'll come back and haunt you."  
  
"It's not a spirit!" contradicted Chibi Marik. "It's a Norwegian Floating-Chicken Spy. It just wants us to not know its real identity."  
  
"And how much sugar did you have this morning?" asked Chibi Ryou.  
  
"Let's see... I had two boxen of glazed doughnuts, eleven pounds of sugar, thirty-two lollipops, fifteen chocolate cookies, a cherry coke, half a moosen, and an egg with oregano."  
  
"Oh great," thought the other chibis. "A crazy psycho on sugar high."  
  
An hour later, they were still trudging through the snow. "That's it!" shouted Chibi Bakura. "I'm hitch-hiking again!" Just at that moment a truck full of Mexican's (A/N: I do NOT have anything against other races!) drove by. The chibis ran and jumped onto the back and collided with the passengers already in it.  
  
"Wheeeee!" squealed Chibi Marik, his sugar high kicking in again. " We were running and running and running and wheeeee!" The poor Mexicans were scared half to death.  
  
Pretty soon they had neared the street that they were supposed to turn at. The chibis waited to get off, but the truck just passed by it. Chibi Bakura was furious as he shouted- -  
  
A bird chirped in Madagascar. A penguin squeaked in China. A moosen was shot in Canadia. (A/N: That's a really long inside joke. All you need to know is that Canadia is the same thing as Canada.) Can we hear what Chibi Bakura cursed? Nope! But the other chibis could...  
  
Chibis Ryou and Marik stared at Chibi Bakura. The Mexicans just sat there like nothing had happened. The silence between everyone was uneasy, and finally Chibi Ryou broke it. "We could just jump off..." They stood up to do that when the Mexicans reached out, grabbed them, and pulled them back in.  
  
"*Spanish words*," one of them said. "*Even more Spanish words*."  
  
Another one spoke: "*Some more Spanish words*"  
  
Chibi Marik decided to join their conversation: "*Long string of Egyptian cursing*."  
  
"See Ryou," Chibi Bakura said to his hikari. "My word wasn't as bad as /that/."  
  
"Shh!" said one of the Mexicans. (A/N: I'm beginning to feel bad calling them "Mexicans", but then again, I wouldn't mind if someone called me "American" or "Italian" or "Human". I just want to say again that I have nothing against other races, and that all the cursing I am doing is NOT a stereotype of any sort.) "*Long strings of Spanish cursing*."  
  
"And I didn't say anything as bad as that either."  
  
"Hey!" shouted Chibi Marik. "You're making me look bad! *Even more Egyptian cursing*"  
  
"Is that even a word?" asked Chibi Bakura. "Great! Now you're making me look bad! *Long strings of Canadian cursing*."  
  
And all the Mexicans simultaneously go: "Ooo... Canadian..."  
  
"Isn't that where we're headed?" asked one of the Mexicans in perfect English.  
  
"Yeah," answered another with a Southern accent.  
  
Then the Mexicans started to sing, "Blame Canadia! Blame Canadia!" (A/N: I stole that from South Park, but I altered the words a bit) until a moosen fell on their car and made them fall off a cliff; so they all yelled "AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" except for the chibis. They yelled, "Brake for moosi! It could save your life!" But it was too late for the Mexicans... That's what you get for trying to sneak into Canadia without your green card.  
  
"Great," thought Chibi Ryou aloud. "We're stuck in the middle of Canadia with a bunch of dead Mexicans, and it's all your fault!"  
  
Suddenly a voice echoed from all around them: "Don't get mad! Get gland! And call 1-800-555-ROAR to order your free zookeeper today!"  
  
"You idiot!" yelled another voice. "You're not supposed to advertise cheap products! You're supposed to save the chibis' lives!"  
  
"Or we could just sit and have buttered scones for tea," suggested a third voice. Then the hobbits that had been speaking came skipping out of the forest singing, "We're hobbits and we're okay! We sleep all night, and we eat all day!"  
  
The chibis looked at each other and back at the hobbits simultaneously. Suddenly, the hobbits sprouted wings and changed into dragons. "Holy- -" started Chibi Bakura, but before he could finish his curse the three dragons had picked them up and were flying away. In mid-air the dragons changed into rabid monkeys.  
  
Chibi Ryou froze and began to chant, "Purple moose will protect me from the evil rabid monkeys from hell. (A/N: I stole that from my friend's fic (MusicChick3000), but she stole the purple moose from me. ^__^) Purple moose will protect me from the evil rabid monkeys from hell." With that the rabid monkeys changed into purple moose, making Chibi Marik freak out.  
  
"Evil Caribou Reindeer will protect me from the freaky purple moose," he began to chant.  
  
"Don't worry," one of them said. "Besides, reindeer are nothing more than flying moose."  
  
Within fifteen minutes the purple moose had dropped the three chibis on the Ishtar's doorstep. It took a few more minutes for the chibis to get up from the snow, and just as they had succeeded Chibi Isis burst out of the house yelling and crying. She knocked Chibi Marik back into the snow, but helped the two others into the house.  
  
"Thanks, Isis!" Chibi Marik yelled from the snow. "Malik! Get out here and help me!" Chibi Malik just stood in the doorway and smirked at his yami. "Malik! I'll kill you!" Chibi Malik just stood there and continued grinning. He knew he probably would die, but he wanted to save a mental picture of his yami begging for help.  
  
*Isis's POV*  
  
I was still threatening my little brother when I heard the front door slam. I dropped Malik and ran to the door, thinking it might be Ryou and/or Bakura. When I reached it, I saw Malik's yami jump into the neighbor's car and speed away. My eyes began to see red when he almost ran into the kids down the street. I whipped around and faced my little brother. "Do you know where your crazy yami just drove off to with the neighbor's car?"  
  
Malik's face went blank and, somehow, even whiter than it already was. I could tell he was cracking up inside, but he pretended to be scared of me. "N-n-no," he stuttered.  
  
I began to shake with fury. I had always thought of myself as Ryou's foster mother ever since his parents had died from lack of oxygen in that septic tank or whatever it was. All I remember was that it was my brother's yami's fault. He came in smirking and dragging their corpses in a plastic bag.  
  
I grabbed my brother by his arm and demanded to know where he went. When he still said he had no idea, I tied him upside down on the couch.  
  
A few minutes later, the doorbell rang. I leaped up from the chair that I was sitting in and ran to answer the door, thinking that it might be Ryou this time. All that was there was Yugi, his yami, Joey, Tristan, and Téa. Ugh! I /hate/ Téa! All those gay little friendship speeches that she does! I wish that my brother had killed /her/ instead of Ryou's parents.  
  
"Hey Isis!" started Yugi. I was not in the mood for his innocence today. I slammed the door in their faces.  
  
"Who was that?" Malik called from the couch. I wasn't in the mood for him, either, even though I enjoyed it so much when he was suffering. I walked upstairs to my room at the front of the house and stared out the window. Within minutes I had fallen asleep.  
  
I woke up to the sound of screaming. I jerked up my head and ran downstairs to see what type of trouble Malik had somehow gotten into. I found him exactly as I had left him: tied up upside down on the couch. I untied him and ran to the front door. I swung it open and saw Ryou, Bakura, and Marik coated in snow. I ran out to greet them, "accidentally" knocked Marik into the snow, and led the other two into the house.  
  
The two chibis spent the next two nights at my house and told us what had happened. Poor guys... For once I actually pity those psycho yamis...  
  
  
  
Mystical Knight Dragon: There's the first chappie! I'm hoping to get the next one up today. It's going to be a lot shorter than this one. I hope that it wasn't too confusing and that you liked it! As always, flames are frowned upon and reviews are welcomed with a plate of cookies that I just so happen to not have. Merry Christmas/Happy Hanukah/Merry (or Happy?) Kwanzaa/Happy Holidays/Seasons' Greetings! 


	2. The Meaning of Christmas and the Mall

Chibi Bakura's First December  
  
Mystical Knight Dragon: Everything I said last time still applies in this chappie. If you didn't read the last chappie, I suggest that you go back and do so or you'll be very lost. I think. I don't know. Anyways, special thanks to the people who reviewed: Teenager Rika, Rosz of the Angel (and her siblings ^-^), and Shiroi Yuki!!!  
  
I was in the middle of writing this chappie when I asked myself Why are they chibis? Then I realized that everyone else might be asking that. I cleared it up for myself, and now I get to tell you why. *a fire appears out of nowhere and I am suddenly dressed in long black robes* o_O;;;; (heh... sweatdrops look funny...) Anyways...it all started on the first chappie. I was writing the words as they sounded when the chibis spoke them, like laughing became waffing. I was getting /very/ confused, so I ditched that idea and just spelt everything how it is spelt.  
  
Something else that I confused myself about: When they talk or it's their POV (point of view) they call each other their regular names. When they're just wandering around in aimless circles, they get a "Chibi" stamp stuck on them. That's an odd way to put it, but it works...kind of...  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! Or evil fuzzy bears. I don't know who does, but I know I don't.  
  
Warnings: This story contains much yaoi. I won't list the pairings, because then I'll be stuck to that and my (cough, cough) creativity (Yeah right. Like I have any of that...) won't be able to show. Stupid teachers... Always telling me what I have and don't have, like human rights... Uh, yeah. I've done enough talking. Onto the story!  
  
  
  
/December 15: Christmas and the Mall/  
  
Chibi Bakura sifted awake and moved about under the covers. He yawned a bit and opened his eyes, and was greeted by a smiling Ryou.  
  
"Did you get me anything for Christmas?" his hikari asked. There it was again: Christmas. The last time he had heard about that was right before they had hitch-hiked the Bill Molester.  
  
"What /is/ Christmas?" Chibi Bakura asked.  
  
Chibi Ryou sighed. His yami obviously hadn't bought him anything. "Christmas is when we celebrate the birth of Jesus. And then Santa Claus comes down the chimney and gives everyone presents. But we have to buy each other presents, too, so that the mall can also have a merry Christmas."  
  
Chibi Bakura looked confused. "Is Santa Jesus?"  
  
Chibi Ryou mentally slapped himself. Why did his yami have to be such an airhead? He tried to explain it again, but frustration (A/N: Who knows where he got that from...) overpowered calamity and he burst out: "Jesus has nothing to do with Santa!"  
  
"Oh," Chibi Bakura stated simply. "So when is this Christmas thing anyways?"  
  
"In ten days," the other mocked.  
  
"So in ten days, some man comes down our chimney and gives us free gifts?"  
  
"Close enough, but remember that you also have to buy every one else a gift. I already got you something, a chainsaw for Marik, Windex (A/N: I don't own Windex. I wish I did, though, because it smells good...) for Malik..." Ten minutes later Chibi Ryou still hadn't finished with his list of presents that he had bought.  
  
Chibi Bakura looked dazed. "Do I have to buy that much stuff?" he asked.  
  
"Yes," the lighter half said simply. Chibi Bakura groaned. He had a lot of shopping to do in only ten days. "If you want," started Chibi Ryou, "I could help you with your shopping. I still have to get stuff for Isis, Yugi, Téa, Joey- -"  
  
"Ok, ok," Chibi Bakura yelled at him. "I get the point. Now, let's go before you go into another amazingly long list of stuff."  
  
Finally the two warmly dressed chibis had made it out the door. A little ways down the road, they bumped into Chibi Yugi and Chibi Yami. The two darker halves bumped into each other so hard that they both fell backwards into the snow, making the lighter halves giggle.  
  
"Be quiet, Ryou!" Chibi Bakura scolded. His mean face was so cold that all of the others began to laugh. "It's not funny!"  
  
"Oh, lighten up," Chibi Yami said, struggling to get up. "Get in the Christmas spirit! Or," he paused to let the moment sink in, "does the former tomb robber not know what that is?"  
  
"Of course I do!" Chibi Bakura spat at the former pharaoh. "It's when Jesus comes down the chimblee and gives us free gifts!"  
  
There was a slight pause than a "Close enough," from Chibi Yami. The two chibis looked around for their hikaris and saw that they were about a hundred feet ahead. "Hey, Yugi!" Chibi Yami shouted. "Wait up!" The hikaris just laughed and ran towards the mall. The yamis sighed and jogged after them.  
  
Soon enough, the four chibis had entered the mall. Every inch of space was coated with some sort of Christmas decoration: flying Santas, running reindeer, floating angels, lighted nativity scenes, beautiful trees on fires...  
  
"Oh no!" groaned Chibi Ryou, looking at the trees. "Malik's /already/ burned the trees! He does that every year before I get to see them!"  
  
Chibi Bakura was mad. Not only had Chibi Malik upset his hikari, but he had never even seen a tree up close with ornaments on it before, only the ones on T.V. He saw a flash of bleach-blonde hair flick by. "Malik!" he called at it. Chibi Bakura was so pissed at him that he could hardly yell. Chibi Malik turned around, grinned, and kept walking.  
  
Chibi Bakura was going to go after him when his hikari spoke up: "It's alright, Bakura. We'll get our own tree this year and decorate it ourselves. That way Malik can't burn it down."  
  
"That's a great idea, Ryou!" Chibi Yugi shrieked. "My grandpa and mommy always have extra ornaments that don't fit on our tree. You can borrow them if you want."  
  
"Thanks Yugi!" Chibi Ryou grinned. "Now let's go buy presents!"  
  
As they walked towards one of the many stores, Chibi Bakura growled over his shoulder, "I'll get you Malik. I won't forget what you did. Even though Ryou said it was alright, I know that's not what he's thinking." He was startled back to reality when something grabbed him from behind. He remembered that smell from somewhere... "Hello...Bill?" he asked timidly.  
  
"I'm not Bill," said a voice from behind him.  
  
"Oh. Sorry Marik." He felt himself being let go by the other chibi. "What do you want?"  
  
"I just wanted to tell you that Ryou went into that store way back there."  
  
"Oh. Thanks." Chibi Bakura turned to walk towards the store when he remembered something. "Marik, why do you smell like lilacs?" He turned to face the other yami only to find him lighting a tree on fire. Chibi Bakura mentally slapped himself. Why were they /both/ lighting trees? And why was Isis letting them? He shook his head and went to find his hikari.  
  
An hour later Chibi Bakura was beginning to get bored. "Remind me why we're here again," he moaned.  
  
Chibi Yugi was about to answer when Chibi Ryou interrupted: "Why don't we go see Santa?" They all agreed with this and another hour later found them standing in a line.  
  
"Why are we standing around just to sit on some big fat guy's lap to tell him what we want when everyone else is going to get us that?" asked Chibi Bakura.  
  
"Since when did you become an expert on Christmas?" asked Chibi Yami.  
  
"Ever since I read everyone's minds," grinned Chibi Bakura. "Yours has some pretty interesting stuff in it, might I add."  
  
The other three chibis turned white. They had forgotten that the tomb robber could read their minds. He must have, too, or he would've found out about Christmas that way a long time ago.  
  
By that time they had reached Santa. Chibi Yugi jumped up on his lap and immediately burst into a long list of the stuff that he wanted. "I want a pony, a light bulb, some batteries, a beach ball plushy with blue and purple stripes, a new pair of socks, and a red rubber boot." He got down, and it was his yami's turn.  
  
"I want a new chain for my puzzle, a foot warmer, a feather down blanket, and a leather chair made of plastic." Santa looked like he was about to fall asleep at this point. Chibi Yami got down, and Chibi Ryou got up.  
  
"I want a puppy, a flippy kitty, a stick, a googly eye, a Dr. Seuss book (A/N: Do I own Dr. Seuss? No, and I'm glad I don't... *shudders at the thought of a crazy psycho wandering around her house*), and a dancing snowman that sings." Santa was beginning to snore as Chibi Ryou stumbled off his lap. This ticked Chibi Bakura off royally. He jumped onto Santa's lap and began to rattle off his Christmas list.  
  
"I want a dozen knives, a Thousand Ways to Kill Others book, a 25 inch circular saw, and 50 feet of rope." Santa's eyes slid open as his mind began to process what Chibi Bakura was asking for. "And next time, listen to my hikari, or I'll kill you." Santa's eyes flew open the rest of the way as he watched the tomb robber slide off his lap and wander off to the different stores.  
  
"Psycho..." Santa muttered as he started to fall back to sleep.  
  
As the sky was getting darker, the chibis decided that it was time to go home. Santa was near the door, so Chibi Bakura yelled at him that he wanted a flame thrower. "Psycho..." Santa muttered again as he watched the chibis' retreating backs and went back to sleep.  
  
While in the mall, Chibi Ryou had bought a Christmas tree that was six feet tall. This might not seem very big, but to someone who's just above two feet tall, it was huge. Not too far from the mall, the chibis decided that they would not be able to carry the tree /and/ the presents to Chibi Ryou's house, even with Chibi Yugi and Chibi Yami's help. Chibi Bakura knew that he was going to be the one that had to solve this problem, so he began to scan the parking lot for easy accessible trucks. His eyes rested on a red F250 (A/N: Do I own Ford? No I don't.) with the keys dangling in the ignition. "Idiots," he muttered as the four began walking towards the car.  
  
Chibi Ryou must've guessed what his yami was thinking of doing. "You don't mean that we're going to /steal/ this person's car, do you?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah," Chibi Bakura said monotonously as if stealing a car was an everyday thing that everyone did. "Now put all that junk in the back and hop in. We need to get going so we can get home before it becomes pitch-black out here. I can't drive very well in the dark." /I can't drive very well when it's not dark, either,/ he thought to himself. /But they don't need to know that./  
  
In a matter of seconds, the four chibis had climbed into the truck and were speeding off to Chibi Ryou's house to set up the tree. "Santa's not going to bring you anything this year," Chibi Ryou told his yami while gripping his seat and closing his eyes after a close encounter with some cows.  
  
"That's great," Chibi Bakura muttered as he gripped the steering wheel with both hands. "Now shut up and tell me how we get to your house."  
  
Chibi Ryou looked around and saw a whole bunch of Amish people. "Uh, I have no idea where we are."  
  
Chibi Bakura slammed on the brakes sending everyone flying into the windshield. "You what?!" he yelled.  
  
Chibi Ryou looked his yami straight in the eyes and said slowly, "I have no idea where we are. You got us lost, and now you have to get us unlost."  
  
Chibi Bakura was stunned into silence. Since when had his hikari gotten to be so brave? He was supposed to be shy and silent, not boss his yami around. The chibi spun the car around and began driving along random roads until they finally reached Ryou's house. "That was fun," he said sarcastically.  
  
"Yeah," agreed Chibi Yami. "But you could've used your ring sooner to help us find our way home."  
  
"Oh shut up," Chibi Bakura spat at him. "At least I got you here in one piece."  
  
"Uh, guys?" ventured Chibi Yugi from outside the car. "Instead of fighting can you help me and Ryou carry stuff in?" Chibi Yami and Chibi Bakura glared at each other a bit longer before helping their hikaris bring in the packages.  
  
Later that night, Chibis Yugi, Yami, Ryou, Bakura, Téa (_), Joey, Tristan, Mai, Seto, Mokuba, Isis, Malik, and Marik were crammed into Chibi Ryou's living room helping set up the Christmas tree. Chibi Bakura and Chibi Yami were not on speaking terms with each other, and would have long glaring fights every once in a while. To break up the tension, Chibi Ryou told his yami to go order pizza for their dinner. Chibi Bakura reluctantly went to the phone, growling at Chibi Yami the whole time he backed out of the room.  
  
"Why can't you guys take a break and be peaceful for /one/ fricken day of the year?!" Chibi Ryou yelled at them, his patience finally cracked. "We all have to put up with Téa /every/ day of the year! She's ten times more annoying than both of you put together! So just /please/ don't fight until /after/ Christmas!!!" The whole room went quiet, making Chibi Ryou blush a bit; but the yamis were considerably more peaceful with each other after that., and Chibi Malik only tried to light the tree once.  
  
Pretty soon the pizza had arrived, and all the chibis stampeded to the door. "Food!!!" they yelled when swung it open. They gasped when they saw who the delivery guy was. He was really fat and had about three hairs on his shiny head. (A/N: If you can guess who this guy is, I'll...um...give you complementary doughnuts...perhaps?)  
  
"Oh, not you again!" moaned Chibi Marik, coming in from the kitchen looking for matches. He picked up his rod, but just before he was going to ram the dagger part of it through Mr. Homo's head, a giant Man Eater Bug had killed him. "That's not fair!" Chibi Marik yelled at Chibi Bakura. "I wanted to kill him!"  
  
"But I didn't want tons of blood on my doorstep," Chibi Ryou told him. Chibi Marik looked stunned for a second, but continued his search for matches without a word.  
  
"Psycho..." they muttered as they retreated back to the tree with the pizza. Once they finished that, they went out back to the pool for the annual cheesy bread throwing. (A/N: I don't own Dominoes. Wish I did, but I don't.) The poor neighbors... All they heard was, "You're free cheesy bread! *splash* You're free! Hey! You got me wet! You're free Bakura! *giant splash* You're free! *long strings of Egyptian cursing* you!"  
  
  
  
Mystical Knight Dragon: That's all for now! If you can guess who the delivery guy is, you get free complimentary doughnuts and my invisible friend named Bob. I'm also going to need some present ideas for chappie 4. So please review!!!  
  
Bob: *holding complementary doughnuts* I'm a free invisible friend! 


	3. The Perfect Gift

Chibi Bakura's First December  
  
Mystical Knight Dragon: Hello! I'm back! Sorry for the shortness of the previous chappie... Actually, I think this one might be even shorter _ Anyways, lossa thanks to my reviewers: Shiroi Yuki and Passion!!! The pizza dude was Homer Simpson. I suck at describing, don't I? (Everyone: *nods* Yes you do!) Ah well... *gives Shiroi Yugi and Passion complementary doughnuts anyways* Anything that I had said last time still applies. Not quite sure what I said last time, but whatever...  
  
Warnings: Mucho character bashing, OOC, and yaoi. Don't like? Then go away.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! Ok? Ok.  
  
  
  
December 24: The Perfect Gift  
  
Chibi Bakura was having an uneasy sleep. He was having a dream where a giant pair of unblinking eyeballs was (A/N: Doesn't correct English sound weird?) staring at him. He tried to run away from them, but they followed him wherever he went. At last he couldn't run any farther. He collapsed on the ground and turned to face them: those big chocolate-brown orbs that just stared and didn't blink. They began to close in on the chibi, and he felt as if he was being swallowed up into their depths.  
  
Chibi Bakura jerked awake in a cold sweat only to find his hikari's chocolate-brown eyes looking into his. "Are you alright?" Chibi Ryou asked his yami. "You were yelling in your sleep."  
  
The darker half blinked a bit and overlooked his light's kindness. "What do you want Ryou?" he spat at him.  
  
Chibi Ryou quailed under his yami's anger, but managed to gasp out, "Christmas is tomorrow. Are you done with your shopping?" Chibi Bakura groaned. He had gotten presents for everyone he knew using that old lady's credit card. Everyone's.except his hikari's. "I take it you're not done," Chibi Ryou continued, using his yami's groan for an answer. "You'd better get out of bed and hurry up!" Chibi Bakura groaned again.  
  
*Chibi Bakura's POV*  
  
My hikari sounds like an overprotective mother. Chibi Malik's yami isn't too annoyingly protective. Heck, he doesn't even care what happens to his hikari, just as long as no one else touches him. Still, that's no excuse for me to not get Ryou a gift. I roll out of bed and landed on the floor learning that carpet is /not/ soft. I get up and reach into my closet for something to wear. Ryou, by this time, had left the room, leaving me alone to my thoughts. What can I get him? I know! I'll call Malik for some ideas!  
  
I threw on some clothes, ran out of my room, down the stairs, and into the kitchen, grabbed the phone, and was dialing the Ishtar's number in a matter of seconds. It rang quite a few times before anyone picked up.  
  
"Hello?" asked the tired voice on the other end.  
  
It was Isis! My palms grew clammy, my throat dry, and my voice raspy. I took a deep breath and managed to muster a "Hey Isis!"  
  
There was a slight pause and a giant crash before she said, "Sorry Bakura; but Malik is unconscious right now, and Marik is setting the neighbor's new car on fire."  
  
"Oh," I said, sounding like an idiot. "Well, that's alright. I just needed some ideas on what I should get my hikari for Christmas. I know /they/ would've told me that I should get him knives or chainsaws, but he's not really into the whole killing thing."  
  
"Hmm..." Isis thought aloud. I could imagine her every movement as she wandered around, looking around for ideas on what I could get Ryou. I almost laughed when I thought about what Malik would say if he knew that I was thinking about his sister this way.  
  
At about this point, I realized that I was also wandering about. I looked around to see where I was and found that I was in Ryou's room. I looked at his organization, but found no Ryou. I really wish that I could've seen his sweet face. I was going to leave right then when Isis yelled that she had thought of the perfect gift.  
  
/That's odd,/ I thought to myself. /I forgot that I was even talking to her. Hmm... Usually when that happens, I talk aloud. Oh my gosh! She probably heard me say that I wanted to see Ryou! Why am I freaking out? It's not like I'm in love with him or anything... Crud! I'm doing it again! Why do I keep talking to myself out loud?!/  
  
"Are you done?" Isis asked. She knows I like him! Wait... I /don't/ like him. Or do I? Isis sighted. "You really need to learn how to talk to yourself."  
  
"What are you doing in my room?" Ryou asked from behind me. I probably jumped fifty feet in the air I freaked out so much. How long had he been standing there? Why hadn't I heard him come in? Ryou sighed. "You /really/ need to learn how to talk to yourself," he mocked. Had I been talking out lout /again/?! "Yes, and by the way, I just got here. Now, please leave. I gotta wrap presents."  
  
"You mean I have to /wrap/ what I got everyone?!" I asked.  
  
"Yes!" Ryou and Isis yelled at me at the same time.  
  
"Gosh..." I muttered as I left the room. Once out, I asked Isis what she thought of that I could get Ryou. She told me, and my smile grew wider and wider with every word. We hung up a bit later, and I ran to finish wrapping the presents that I had bought. I wasn't finished wrapping and shopping until about 11 o'clock. By that time I was exhausted and fell straight to sleep.  
  
  
  
Mystical Knight Dragon: And there's chappie 3! I hope you liked it! Please review!!! I need ideas on presents that everybody got everybody else. And if you can guess what Bakura is giving Ryou, then I'll give you a complimentary doughnut. Good bribe? 


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